As I was looking at what is no longer permitted in my kitchen I was please to see that I have achieved many of the goals I set before me.
I have no more white flour items in my cupboards. No more coffee shop pastries (actually no more coffee as well).; my snacks are now healthy fruits, veggies and raw crackers. Some sprouts from time to time.
I'm making green smoothies and loving them. My body is changing. Changing what it will accept as far as food goes and changing how my clothes feel. Wonderful!
Heading to bed early tonight...have an early start tomorrow.
Have you looked at your goals lately? How are you doing??
Hugs,
Doll
Thursday, May 29, 2008
Wednesday, May 28, 2008
Mid week
I know, once again it's been a long time since I've been here. Alas gone but not forgotten!
Just been very busy with life. A good thing for sure.
Concerts, rehearsals, auditions etc and so much fun.
I have much of my food under control. The exercise is very much a work in progress but again, not forgotten.
Coffee is no longer a part of my life and for the next 28 days there will be no salt shaker on my table. For those of you who know me this is huge!
Each morning now starts with hot water with a slice of lemon followed by a fresh fruit smoothie. No dairy...just fruit. I love it. The weight is hovering but on the average still on a downward trend.
Definitely need a new bathing suit for the summer as well as a few other, smaller things. Great! Can you see me smiling????
Life continues...so do I.
How are you doing?
Til again,
Doll
Just been very busy with life. A good thing for sure.
Concerts, rehearsals, auditions etc and so much fun.
I have much of my food under control. The exercise is very much a work in progress but again, not forgotten.
Coffee is no longer a part of my life and for the next 28 days there will be no salt shaker on my table. For those of you who know me this is huge!
Each morning now starts with hot water with a slice of lemon followed by a fresh fruit smoothie. No dairy...just fruit. I love it. The weight is hovering but on the average still on a downward trend.
Definitely need a new bathing suit for the summer as well as a few other, smaller things. Great! Can you see me smiling????
Life continues...so do I.
How are you doing?
Til again,
Doll
Sunday, May 11, 2008
The Nation's Capitol
Had to include one of me. 
Thought I'd share some pics of our trip down town yesterday.
This weekend was the annual Tulip Festival. The flowers were beautiful. My camera didn't pick up the intensity of the colours.
We're heading out to the movies. I've had a really nice dinner and a great Mother's Day.
Hope all my friends have done something special today for someone they love.
Keeping on...keeping it fresh and simple!
Hugs
Doll
Friday, May 9, 2008
Happy Friday!
I know, it's been a week since you saw me last. Was my week crazy? You betcha! After last weekend's concert I basically went into rest mode. The fatigue is not about the time I spend but the amount of energy that goes into performance. It's invigorating and exciting but it does expend a lot of "me". Talk about burning calories!
This week I've been continuing with lots of fresh fruit and veggies. There's been a few no-no's on my plate this week but not enough to derail me. The coffee is totally gone. The coffee maker is now in the cupboard and we've purchased no bags of the good stuff. lol
Last Saturday I was able to pick up my new bunnies. Winnie and Bobby are now part of our family. So cute and fun! They are 1 1/2 years old, white, angoras! I was told they were litter trained which is true when they stay in their cage...outside of their confines is yet another story!
Been able to relax and get back to my second love which is washing, carding and spinning fiber. I picked up 2 pounds of raw suffolk that is washing up nicely. I find suffolk to be nice and strong for Nick's socks. These wear like iron. Which means they don't need repaired every week. lol
Well, off to enjoy the day. How about you? Ready to face the weekend???
Hugs
Doll
This week I've been continuing with lots of fresh fruit and veggies. There's been a few no-no's on my plate this week but not enough to derail me. The coffee is totally gone. The coffee maker is now in the cupboard and we've purchased no bags of the good stuff. lol
Last Saturday I was able to pick up my new bunnies. Winnie and Bobby are now part of our family. So cute and fun! They are 1 1/2 years old, white, angoras! I was told they were litter trained which is true when they stay in their cage...outside of their confines is yet another story!
Been able to relax and get back to my second love which is washing, carding and spinning fiber. I picked up 2 pounds of raw suffolk that is washing up nicely. I find suffolk to be nice and strong for Nick's socks. These wear like iron. Which means they don't need repaired every week. lol
Well, off to enjoy the day. How about you? Ready to face the weekend???
Hugs
Doll
Thursday, May 1, 2008
Wednesday, April 30, 2008
End of the Month
Thought I quickly post before I get my day going!
Total lost since January 1st 19.6 pounds! My target was 20 so very, very close eh?
I'm really happy with that number. My body is slowly changing as I get rid of all the bad toxins inside of me. This week I am eating mostly raw (more than 70%), no salt and no caffeine. Big step for me. I've been caffeine free since Sunday morning and have not picked up the salt shaker or had processed foods that contain a lot of salt. The result, great weight loss.
In April my weight went up and down a lot so I'm glad that it settled in the down part.
Up for May? More raw fruits and vegetables, continuing to minimize salt and caffeine.
Next step, more exercise.
I know I can do this!
Have a terrific day!
Doll
Total lost since January 1st 19.6 pounds! My target was 20 so very, very close eh?
I'm really happy with that number. My body is slowly changing as I get rid of all the bad toxins inside of me. This week I am eating mostly raw (more than 70%), no salt and no caffeine. Big step for me. I've been caffeine free since Sunday morning and have not picked up the salt shaker or had processed foods that contain a lot of salt. The result, great weight loss.
In April my weight went up and down a lot so I'm glad that it settled in the down part.
Up for May? More raw fruits and vegetables, continuing to minimize salt and caffeine.
Next step, more exercise.
I know I can do this!
Have a terrific day!
Doll
Monday, April 28, 2008
Great Weekend
We had a wonderful, exciting, fun-filled weekend! This is a picture of part of the back wall of the
church. We had some really talented people put many hours into creating out set designs etc.
Nick (beside me) played Pharoah! A great role!
Don't you think we had fun? My role? Director and pianist. Cast of characters included Miriam, Moses, Aaron, Joshua, many Hebrew Slaves, Palace Princesses, many dancers etc etc etc. Not going to include pics of them here since I don't yet have their permission.
My daughter, Katie, was our resident "RAPPER GIRL" She did an amazing job and learned it all in only 2 weeks!
I'll share more pics as they become available.
Wednesday, April 23, 2008
A quick note
...before I head off to bed. What a great but busy week this has been. The musical will be presented Saturday evening, Sunday morning and Sunday afternoon. The cast and singers have all worked very hard to bring the story of Moses to life. So much fun. Hope to post a couple of pics tomorrow.
A continued new look for me. Today I picked up my new glasses. Time for my age to show...or not...I know am a proud wearer of bi-focals. They are progressives so no lines but getting used to them is interesting. I haven't had new glasses in so very long...almost feels like a treat for me. One thing for sure, my night vision is drastically improved. Now, reading the music at the piano is still an issue but I'm sure I'll get used to it.
Lots of great healthy food for me today. I'm feeling tired but good.
I like feeling "good" when I go to bed. There's a peacefulness that comes with it that envelopes me much like the flannel sheet that I love.
So, with flannel around you or not...sweet dreams!
A continued new look for me. Today I picked up my new glasses. Time for my age to show...or not...I know am a proud wearer of bi-focals. They are progressives so no lines but getting used to them is interesting. I haven't had new glasses in so very long...almost feels like a treat for me. One thing for sure, my night vision is drastically improved. Now, reading the music at the piano is still an issue but I'm sure I'll get used to it.
Lots of great healthy food for me today. I'm feeling tired but good.
I like feeling "good" when I go to bed. There's a peacefulness that comes with it that envelopes me much like the flannel sheet that I love.
So, with flannel around you or not...sweet dreams!
Monday, April 21, 2008
Spring has sprung!
I'm just so excited by the fact that the snow is finally gone from our yard. Seems like a major miracle for sure!Here you have the before and after picture of our pool. With the help of Katie (daughter 22) Nick and I were able to pull the cover off the pool on Saturday.
What was hilarious was me shovelling snow off the edge of the cover while wearing shorts!
This is the "new" me taken just before lunch today. I definitely need another taken sans laundry. lol I got my hair cut last Friday. Since I arrived here in June 2006 my hair has lost 24 inches plus! Big change for me.
The past week I lost 5 pounds but then I had gained 5 pounds a couple of weeks ago so it's all balanced.
My weight loss is due to my significant cut in sodium! This is something I track each day. If I keep my levels low then I lose weight. Pretty simple formula eh? Well, it works for me right now!
And, lets face it....what is NOW is what's really important. Right?
Let me know what you think.
Have a super terrific day!
Monday, April 14, 2008
To be or....
Each day I rise, give thanks for the day, tell myself I'm having a great day and I face what's coming at me.
Last Friday I took a huge leap, at least for me. I had my eyes checked for new glasses. I'm not sure but could have easily been 12 years since my last check so it was definitely time. The news...it's time for bifocals. I sure hope when I get them that my reading at the piano is easier. I've been having a difficult time seeing the music and between you and me...I'm not really good at making things up.
My program has been all over the map this weekend. Not really sure what's going on inside of me but whatever it is it had better stop. What with the pre-menopausal stuff and the stress of performance I just just can't keep track any more.
So the question is: "To be on program or not" To be on which program...or not! Do I choose my favorite healthy foods or sink down to what is most comforting at the moment.
See...way too many questions for me right now. Far too many decisions...at least about food. I don't like being so, dare I say, anal about it. Am I in control of my life or is my diet in control of my life. UGH!!! See what I mean?
The week will roll along as it always does. My questions will still be...to be or....and at the end of the week I will still be me. The sun will still shine and the earth will continue on it's own journey. Hey folks...this is not life or death, at least not now. I am taking care of business in the best way I can.
Perhaps after some really good rest I'll see the "being" of my life much clearer.
What do you think?
Last Friday I took a huge leap, at least for me. I had my eyes checked for new glasses. I'm not sure but could have easily been 12 years since my last check so it was definitely time. The news...it's time for bifocals. I sure hope when I get them that my reading at the piano is easier. I've been having a difficult time seeing the music and between you and me...I'm not really good at making things up.
My program has been all over the map this weekend. Not really sure what's going on inside of me but whatever it is it had better stop. What with the pre-menopausal stuff and the stress of performance I just just can't keep track any more.
So the question is: "To be on program or not" To be on which program...or not! Do I choose my favorite healthy foods or sink down to what is most comforting at the moment.
See...way too many questions for me right now. Far too many decisions...at least about food. I don't like being so, dare I say, anal about it. Am I in control of my life or is my diet in control of my life. UGH!!! See what I mean?
The week will roll along as it always does. My questions will still be...to be or....and at the end of the week I will still be me. The sun will still shine and the earth will continue on it's own journey. Hey folks...this is not life or death, at least not now. I am taking care of business in the best way I can.
Perhaps after some really good rest I'll see the "being" of my life much clearer.
What do you think?
Friday, April 11, 2008
It's Friday and it's snowing!
OK, so I can hardly believe it. I went for a quick walk this morning..in the snow. The temp is right around the freezing mark so it was not nice fluffy snow..more like ice pellets. Not nice! Well, at least I went for a walk. Right?
Some days I really get tired of defending myself, my actions or lack of activity. Yes it was a short walk but it was something. Yes, my calories yesterday were low but the food choices were healthy. I knew when I put this blog out on the airways that it could be poo-pooed because I don't do enough. I could lie and write only the good days or make up the good days but that's not my intent. My writing is about me and sometimes about my creativity. Of course, it's also about accountability which is why I'm honest when I track my calories, weight etc.
SO, I straighten my back, wipe off my shoulders and let the negative fall like off a duck's back. Some of you know my struggles; some of you don't care; some of you care deeply. I will continue on my journey, surrounding myself with loving and positive people.
.
My stats for Thursday:
215.8
2 day in calorie range 1139 (my appetite was next to nothing)
0 day exercise
15 days vitamins
2 days 8 glasses of water
2 day in sodium range 1262 (the top of my range is 2400)
The routine at home is often changing as outside commitments change. This week has been no different. With the arrival of my 22 year old daughter our lives have been enriched and livened up some. She's staying with us during a work program here in Ottawa but hopes to teach at the school for the blind in Brantford, ON next fall so will move then. Work programs are a wonderful way for students to learn their trade BUT it's very difficult for them to do this full time without pay. She just completed her final semester at college and of course running low on funds. She will find some part-time work to make up her short fall but again, for only 3 months it's a tough go. Either way, we are very happy to have Katie staying with us even for a short time.
I'm heading into my Friday staying calm, cool and collected. I have numerous rehearsals this weekend, students to teach tonight, a fun evening at the race track with my boss and dear friend (part of her advertising) and some time to tidy up the chateau. (OK, so it's not a castle but it definitely is a home)
Take care all!
Some days I really get tired of defending myself, my actions or lack of activity. Yes it was a short walk but it was something. Yes, my calories yesterday were low but the food choices were healthy. I knew when I put this blog out on the airways that it could be poo-pooed because I don't do enough. I could lie and write only the good days or make up the good days but that's not my intent. My writing is about me and sometimes about my creativity. Of course, it's also about accountability which is why I'm honest when I track my calories, weight etc.
SO, I straighten my back, wipe off my shoulders and let the negative fall like off a duck's back. Some of you know my struggles; some of you don't care; some of you care deeply. I will continue on my journey, surrounding myself with loving and positive people.
.
My stats for Thursday:
215.8
2 day in calorie range 1139 (my appetite was next to nothing)
0 day exercise
15 days vitamins
2 days 8 glasses of water
2 day in sodium range 1262 (the top of my range is 2400)
The routine at home is often changing as outside commitments change. This week has been no different. With the arrival of my 22 year old daughter our lives have been enriched and livened up some. She's staying with us during a work program here in Ottawa but hopes to teach at the school for the blind in Brantford, ON next fall so will move then. Work programs are a wonderful way for students to learn their trade BUT it's very difficult for them to do this full time without pay. She just completed her final semester at college and of course running low on funds. She will find some part-time work to make up her short fall but again, for only 3 months it's a tough go. Either way, we are very happy to have Katie staying with us even for a short time.
I'm heading into my Friday staying calm, cool and collected. I have numerous rehearsals this weekend, students to teach tonight, a fun evening at the race track with my boss and dear friend (part of her advertising) and some time to tidy up the chateau. (OK, so it's not a castle but it definitely is a home)
Take care all!
Wednesday, April 9, 2008
Mid Week...again!
Well, Wednesday is almost over and I'm bushed. Rehearsals were gruelling tonight. Intense work yielding wonderful results. The music is challenging. When the choir members rise to meet the challenge then the music is awesome!
My stats for today:
215.8 (up some but coming back down)
1 day in calorie range 1354
1 day exercise
14 days vitamins
1 day 8 glasses of water
1 day in sodium range 1031
exercise: 25 min walk to work
2 hours walking at the restaurant (very busy day..great people)
These are very specific numbers which help me to see where I'm heading. This journey is all about the travel plan; the map. I create my "map" for the following day just before I head to bed. Courtesy of Google desktop I have my list right in front of me every time I sit down at the pc.
Back is still not back to it's normal self. Sitting at the piano for 3 hours doesn't help the situation at all. I work at changing my position and standing when I can but for the most part I'm seated.
Off to bed. I really need a good night's sleep. Sweet dreams to me and all of you!
My stats for today:
215.8 (up some but coming back down)
1 day in calorie range 1354
1 day exercise
14 days vitamins
1 day 8 glasses of water
1 day in sodium range 1031
exercise: 25 min walk to work
2 hours walking at the restaurant (very busy day..great people)
These are very specific numbers which help me to see where I'm heading. This journey is all about the travel plan; the map. I create my "map" for the following day just before I head to bed. Courtesy of Google desktop I have my list right in front of me every time I sit down at the pc.
Back is still not back to it's normal self. Sitting at the piano for 3 hours doesn't help the situation at all. I work at changing my position and standing when I can but for the most part I'm seated.
Off to bed. I really need a good night's sleep. Sweet dreams to me and all of you!
Tuesday, April 8, 2008
When confusion strikes...
Well friends, it's happened. I've totally lost my focus and continue to be in a state of confusion. So many options; so many choices. Mind boggling and numbing at the same time, I just can't make decisions and certainly not clear ones.
My days start well but slowly go down hill. Mostly due to fatigue. I put out so much energy when I teach and lead that my inner voice just caves.
So, my choices are not great and I'm left with guilt. (if you'd like specifics just send me an email)
As I continue to write I see that my focus isn't totally lost just moved. With 3 performances coming up the end of the month and a major concert just one week later...well I'm sure you can see why my mind isn't totally on my program or plan. And, let's not even talk about how this all makes me anxious and nervous. OH yes, it's all very exciting. The adrenaline rush as rehearsals build and become more refined. The constant questioning...will the music be ready? will the leads actually show up for the next rehearsal? will I be able to follow the ever changing script and make my cues...on time? will I manage another rehearsal with teenage girls who'd rather giggle and talk about their hair...without pulling mine out???
My day closes as I place my mind and heart in a quiet place; calming river and shining water. I find the peace coming slowly but surely and I'm ready for a night's sleep.
May you all find your pillows and sleep the sweet sleep that brings rest and refreshment. I know mine will be welcome.
My days start well but slowly go down hill. Mostly due to fatigue. I put out so much energy when I teach and lead that my inner voice just caves.
So, my choices are not great and I'm left with guilt. (if you'd like specifics just send me an email)
As I continue to write I see that my focus isn't totally lost just moved. With 3 performances coming up the end of the month and a major concert just one week later...well I'm sure you can see why my mind isn't totally on my program or plan. And, let's not even talk about how this all makes me anxious and nervous. OH yes, it's all very exciting. The adrenaline rush as rehearsals build and become more refined. The constant questioning...will the music be ready? will the leads actually show up for the next rehearsal? will I be able to follow the ever changing script and make my cues...on time? will I manage another rehearsal with teenage girls who'd rather giggle and talk about their hair...without pulling mine out???
My day closes as I place my mind and heart in a quiet place; calming river and shining water. I find the peace coming slowly but surely and I'm ready for a night's sleep.
May you all find your pillows and sleep the sweet sleep that brings rest and refreshment. I know mine will be welcome.
Thursday, April 3, 2008
A new day
Wow, I think spring is really on it's way. There's still way too much snow in my yard but for the first time this season I heard a robin this morning. You have no idea how that warmed my heart. Yesterday my husband, Nick, said that he and his buddy saw a Heron out at the sugar bush. They're late returning this year but a welcoming sight for sure!
I've done it! I've been able to refuse the second cup of coffee now for a week. I have my first cup in the morning and that's all. That's a really huge step for me and one I'm very excited about.
TODAY'S STATS:
Weight: 212 down 16 since Jan. 1st 2008
My plan:
Have a terrific day.
I've done it! I've been able to refuse the second cup of coffee now for a week. I have my first cup in the morning and that's all. That's a really huge step for me and one I'm very excited about.
TODAY'S STATS:
Weight: 212 down 16 since Jan. 1st 2008
My plan:
- Mostly resting today and tomorrow. I've been off from the restaurant all week to recover from my injured back.
- I have a quick trip planned to IKEA. Way too much fun. The walking will be good for me.
- 3 students this evening
- Sr. Choir
- my water is set out to remind me to drink lots
- lots of fruit and veggies on the menu
- spinning and knitting
- yoga (for stretching)
- walking
Have a terrific day.
Wednesday, April 2, 2008
Short Post
I've been home for about 3/4 hour and thought I'd quickly update here.
I'm short:
I'm short:
- sleep
- cash
- creative thinking
- in gratitude
- in love
- abundant living
Tuesday, April 1, 2008
April showers bring.....
Well...could be showers, more sunlight, return of the robins, etc. What does April bring your way?
From my Tools to Life action plan I have the following rule of 20 daily activities :
This may look like a long list but some of these things I'm doing already. By following this plan my body will show the progress I wish it to.
The following is my affirmation:
I am 5lbs lighter and have more energy. I get out of bed in the morning feeling well rested and ready to face the day. My clothes are feeling loose and fitting better. My head is clear; my purpose strong and sure.
This is obviously very personal to me and my present needs. If you have any questions about any of the items on the list please let me know.
Sending you "Showers of Blessings!"
Doll
From my Tools to Life action plan I have the following rule of 20 daily activities :
- 1. Eat 5 veggies
- 2. Use my Richard Simmons food mover (track all my food)
- 3. 60 min physical activity
- 4. brush my teeth 3x
- 5. plan my menus
- 6. in bed my mid-night
- 7. Limit chocolate to 1 serving
- 8. evening tai chi or qigong
- 9. morning yoga
- 10. journal
- 11. shower
- 12. limit 1 cup coffee
- 13. no frozen dairy
- 14. rise and shine 8:30
- 15. 64 oz water
- 16. popcorn for treats
- 17. vitamins
- 18. EFT
- 19. bible study and meditation
- 20. email Nick
This may look like a long list but some of these things I'm doing already. By following this plan my body will show the progress I wish it to.
The following is my affirmation:
I am 5lbs lighter and have more energy. I get out of bed in the morning feeling well rested and ready to face the day. My clothes are feeling loose and fitting better. My head is clear; my purpose strong and sure.
This is obviously very personal to me and my present needs. If you have any questions about any of the items on the list please let me know.
Sending you "Showers of Blessings!"
Doll
Monday, March 31, 2008
Make this a short one
I'm coming back to the surface..slowly but surely.
This stupid virus has really held me down. On top of the fever, chest cold and all that goes with that I've injured my back. This time it's pretty bad. I can sit and lie down but walking is tough and getting from one position to another is next to impossible. I'll be heading back to bed here in a bit. The rest will help my back heal as well as kick the last of this virus out of me.
I've been eating mostly fruit and veggies on the weekend. Had next to no appetite.
Tomorrow I'll write more....
edited to add:
today's stats: 213.6 (this makes me very happy) That's a loss of 4.2 since the 17th March.
This stupid virus has really held me down. On top of the fever, chest cold and all that goes with that I've injured my back. This time it's pretty bad. I can sit and lie down but walking is tough and getting from one position to another is next to impossible. I'll be heading back to bed here in a bit. The rest will help my back heal as well as kick the last of this virus out of me.
I've been eating mostly fruit and veggies on the weekend. Had next to no appetite.
Tomorrow I'll write more....
edited to add:
today's stats: 213.6 (this makes me very happy) That's a loss of 4.2 since the 17th March.
Wednesday, March 26, 2008
At the end of the day
It's the end of the day and I am done! I've just arrived home from my evening rehearsals and my body is telling me it's time.
At the end of the day, I've worked
At the end of the day, I've smiled
At the end of the day, I have encouraged friends
At the end of the day, I have prayed for a peace inside me
At the end of this day I have cooled my sore throat with water; taken what is necessary for the fever that has invaded my body and will now go to bed.
I leave with this quote: "Do not expect or look for progress. Enjoy the process"
This sums up my life; my new life. It's about the process; about the journey.
Love to all....
At the end of the day, I've worked
At the end of the day, I've smiled
At the end of the day, I have encouraged friends
At the end of the day, I have prayed for a peace inside me
At the end of this day I have cooled my sore throat with water; taken what is necessary for the fever that has invaded my body and will now go to bed.
I leave with this quote: "Do not expect or look for progress. Enjoy the process"
This sums up my life; my new life. It's about the process; about the journey.
Love to all....
Tuesday, March 25, 2008
Hashing it out!
And no, I don't mean food! lol
As I draw near to the end of the first quarter of 2008 I'll take a look at what I've done.
I know. I can beat myself up pretty good most days. Doesn't seem to matter what I have been able to do I can always focus on what I haven't done. The cycle continues. I feel sad that I've missed my mark; I give up; I try again; I become sad; I give up....over and over again. Talk about an emotional roller coaster.
I've been reading from here
and
have found this statement to be true (at least for me)
"It is fairly easy to believe in God's love in general but it is very difficult to believe in God's love for me personally. Why me? There are very few people who can really accept themselves, accept acceptance. Indeed, it is rare to meet a person who can cope with the problem "Why me?" Self-acceptance can never be based on my own self, my own qualities. Such a foundation would collapse. Self-acceptance is an act of faith. When God loves me, I must accept myself as well. I cannot be more demanding than God, can I?"
This really spoke to me today. I repeat, " I cannot be more demanding than God, can I?". My head speaks to me of acceptance and of love; my heart (emotions) argues me out of it. The acceptance of myself is utmost.
What I do know:
I continue on my journey. So, once more around the bend I go. Anyone want to come with me??
As I draw near to the end of the first quarter of 2008 I'll take a look at what I've done.
- lost 12 pounds
- kept up with my vitamin intake
- cut my coffee consumption in half
- written in my journal; not every day but many days
- moved my exercise from 15 min to 30 min
- increased my water intake from 2 cups to 6 cups
- not made the 5 lbs/month challenge (I still have one more week to do this)
- not cut out coffee completely
- not built my exercise up to 60 min
- not increased my water intake to 8 cups
- not allowed total forgiveness of myself for not meeting these goals
I know. I can beat myself up pretty good most days. Doesn't seem to matter what I have been able to do I can always focus on what I haven't done. The cycle continues. I feel sad that I've missed my mark; I give up; I try again; I become sad; I give up....over and over again. Talk about an emotional roller coaster.
I've been reading from here
and
have found this statement to be true (at least for me)
"It is fairly easy to believe in God's love in general but it is very difficult to believe in God's love for me personally. Why me? There are very few people who can really accept themselves, accept acceptance. Indeed, it is rare to meet a person who can cope with the problem "Why me?" Self-acceptance can never be based on my own self, my own qualities. Such a foundation would collapse. Self-acceptance is an act of faith. When God loves me, I must accept myself as well. I cannot be more demanding than God, can I?"
This really spoke to me today. I repeat, " I cannot be more demanding than God, can I?". My head speaks to me of acceptance and of love; my heart (emotions) argues me out of it. The acceptance of myself is utmost.
What I do know:
- the 12 pounds I've lost are gone for good
- the increase in water has helped
I continue on my journey. So, once more around the bend I go. Anyone want to come with me??
Saturday, March 22, 2008
A quick post before I head out the door. The day is bright, pretty and down right cold! At -12C with the wind chill making it feel like -22C. Did someone say it's spring? I think not!
Today's Stats:
216.8
I'd like to think I know what today will hold but since I have no control over those dear folk around me I can never guess. All I know for sure is me!!
TODAY:
yoga
Food: I'll tell you about this next week.
Hope your weekend is filled with many blessings!
Love
Doll
Today's Stats:
216.8
I'd like to think I know what today will hold but since I have no control over those dear folk around me I can never guess. All I know for sure is me!!
TODAY:
- band rehearsal
- personal practice and prep time for Sunday
- cook and decorate eggs for Sunday's breakfast
- finish my shopping
- work on an choral arrangement for Monday morning's rehearsal
yoga
Food: I'll tell you about this next week.
Hope your weekend is filled with many blessings!
Love
Doll
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